Qunari Do Not
by RenegadeMage
Summary: Okay, so what started out as a quick short story has spiralled into a few drabbles of my Kossith head cannon. Some of the events may be represented during the Inquisition, but I have no way of knowing if they will be actually happening. Just my own little ideas for amusement :)
1. Qunari Do Not Love

**_Qunari Do Not Love_**

_You wish to hear a story?  
Alright, let me tell you about the time the Champion and the Warden...  
Oh? You want to hear a new story?  
Well... let me think..._

The night was late, and still young Taurus did not sleep a wink. He stared grumpily to the roof of his bunk bed, listening to the slight breathing sound of the sleeping babe above his head. How he wished he too would fall asleep. But no luck, not this night. No, this night his head would be plagued with a horrible aching.

He brushed his silver hair back away from his face, then had to do so again as the strands returned to their original position. He groaned, he needed a haircut. No doubt his parents would protest, it was against their preferences. But he detested his hair being long.

The young boy wiggled about tirelessly in his small cot. His head throbbed with the prospect of his oncoming adulthood. He cursed secretly into his pillow, he doubted many other boys his age felt such agony. But, his Papa always reassured him when he reached maturity, he too felt similar pains. Growing horns tended to do that.

…

Ah, I see you are now confused. Here, let me start over. See, this boy was no ordinary boy. This child, was of Kossith race. Kossith, you do not know what that is? Oh, I see… I suppose, it is not a term commonly used. You might know him better as a Qunari. Ah yes, I thought you might recognize that name. No doubt you have heard many nasty tales of the Qunari. One perhaps involving a certain Champion of Kirkwall? The fearless rogue who slayed the evil and merciless oxman leader, the Arishok. Or the stoic and dangerous Qunari who travelled with the Hero of Ferelden, serving his penitence for murder?

Yes, many have heard of the fearsome horned brutes. How they come to our shores in the dead of night, how they pluck innocent children from their homes and make them submit to their barbaric religion. How they torture and maim their own people, if they so much as smile or speak out of term. Apparently they do not even care for their own offspring. How could they? Qunari feel no love.

Well, my dearest one, I can assure you, many of these tales are a farce. I know for a fact, that some of these horned devils were not in fact beasts, they are men, women and children. Just like you and I. This tale I wish to tell you, well, it is all the truth. How do I know you ask? Well, let's just say… I was rather close to the source.

…

Indeed, his Papa reassured him what he felt was natural, nothing to worry over. But he could not for the life of him, ignore the constant ringing in his skull. Perhaps, fresh air would have done the trick. Nothing like the cool Orlesian air to calm his mind.

Creeping from under his blanket, the young grey skinned boy quietly slumped to the floor. As his heavy feet touched the floorboards, they creaked under stress. His face screwed up in a wince. His current home was far too rickety, he would surely wake his parents up if the noise continued. Or worse, he might have awaken…

"What are you doing?" a small voice peeped from above. "Where are you going?"

"Parshaara." He hissed. "I wish to get a drink. Go back to sleep, little Ash."

His little sister scrunched her face up in protest. She didn't like it when her big brother lied to her, and she always knew when he lied to her.

"I'll tell Mamma you are sneaking out again." She pouted.

"No, please don't." he desperately waved his hands about. "Please, I am just getting a drink. Honest."

"You are a stupid horned Qalaba…" her eyes watered. "You never tell the truth. You stink, and I hope you grow little curly horns."

Taurus groaned. Though he loved his little sister, she was a pain in his grey ass.

"Alright, I'm sorry I lied Ash. I just want to get some fresh air, my head is killing me." He rubbed his forehead where several armored plates began to sprout.

"Please don't go…" her lip quivered. "I'm scared."

"Of what, little Imekari?" he tilted his head up.

"Of the bas…" she visibly shivered. "I heard Papa tell Mamma today that humans tried to hurt him. They called him a 'filthy bison' and told him we had to leave, before they cut his horns out…" her voice near squealed.

Taurus clambered up the ladder, gently shushing his sweet little sister. He stroked her short silver hair all tied up in a messy ponytail. Being so young, she could have been mistaken for a human child in dim lighting. Sadly, this would only be temporary. Eventually, she would look just as their mother did. And share the same curse. He sighed, luckily he was spared that little 'gift', but sweet Ash had not.

"My little snoop." He cooed lovingly. "What have we been told about spying?"

"To not do it, especially on grown-ups." She sniffed.

"That's right." He suppressed a chuckle. "Besides, you could have easily misheard Papa, you don't always listen when you are supposed to, let alone when you aren't."

Ash pouted, then wiped her watery eyes.

"But what if I did? What if people come for us… like they did last time?" her lip quivered.

"Then, we shall leave again." He shrugged. "No biggy."

"But what if they get mad…what if…"

"Hey, Papa won't let anyone hurt us." Taurus shook his head. "Those bas wouldn't stand a chance against the mighty Arvaarad of the Tal-Vashoth." The young oxman grinned devilishly. His little sister giggled.

"Papa doesn't like that name."

"Well, that's what the humans would probably call him. Or 'Qunari'." He shrugged. "Besides, Mamma is more than capable of zapping a few stinky bas. And, what have I told you to do if you get into trouble?"

"Close my eyes, take a deep breath, then do this." She lifted her tiny hand, several little sparks left her fingers. "Then, run like a bull on fire."

"That's right." He lightly bumped his sibling's forehead with his own. "Now, go back to sleep. And when you awake, we shall play horseback. In exchange for not telling on me?"

"Alright." She giggled and laid back down on her pillow. Her older brother lifted the blanket up and wrapped it snuggly around the young one, then returned her small stuffed rabbit to her hands.

With a last wave goodbye, the boy quietly slide down the bed onto the floor. Quietly, he sneaked to the windowsill. Luckily their mother had left it open that night, no need to yank it from its squeaky base. Deciding to go out only in his shorts, the boy clambered over the windowsill. With a quick look over the shoulder, to ensure he was not to be followed, he gracefully flung out onto the wall.

Now, his body was not built for such maneuvers. No, it was built like a strong young Kossith should be built, as his father would proudly claim. As each day passed, the boy grew larger and stronger. And yet, he still remained as graceful as the smallest of elves. No doubt that helpful trait would be lost with age, along with his innocent mind. Already he sensed the severity that came with being a part of his race.

As he climbed down the stone wall, he could hear the faint snores of his father echo the lower part of the house. Papa fell asleep keeping guard, he thought. This confirmed what Ash had overheard. The humans had threatened their stay. No doubt, the family would have to pack up and leave again. He wondered where they would go this time. Probably Ferelden, it would be closer than anywhere else. The thought was exciting, another land for the young boy to explore.

He clambered easily down the wall and landed with a slight thump to the earth. He moved with great ease and stealth, almost as elegantly as a little spider. He chuckled. He should have nicknamed himself Spider, rather than another name for bull. Well, it was more so from the constellation his father had pointed out. From that moment on, he wanted to be called Taurus. Too bad he didn't have friends to oblige with that request.

He was Kossith, who would care for him? Even his own kind found him repulsive. Once on their travels they had come across people of their race, and yet they were not. Tal Vashoth, his father called them. A past their Papa was never proud he took part in. But what choice did he have? What choice did his mother have? Love was not accepted in their race, nor was betraying the Qun.

Qun. Taurus spat onto the grass. All the boy knew of it caused him to despise it further. His father detested the mention of the belief in his presence, but their mother still held some of her belief. How could she not? Saarebas found it hard to completely break the chains of their past endures. Some nights he would sneak out to find his mother curled by a fire, huddled into herself, fingers tracing the marks left upon her grey lips. Scars, that would never heal. Just like her horns. He remembered the awkward occasion when Ash asked if she would have no horns like Mamma. Their mother simply shook her head and stated she would have lovely horns when she came of age.

Horns, the thought of the word brought pain to the boys mind. He wished he wouldn't have been burdened with the blighted things. He was informed, much to his distress, that no doubt he would grow ones the size of their fathers. Joyous, considering the size of the senior oxman's horns allowed his kid sister to ride him like a swing. Apparently this was something to be proud of. In Par Vollen, the bigger the horns the more power you held. Bah, what would Taurus care for power, or for his races home land? He would never belong there. He didn't belong anywhere.

He continued to walk. The cooling breeze was doing wonders, just as he suspected. His large feet left marks in the damp grass with each step. The starlight reflected of his grey skin, smooth and unblemished. He was still very young and had never seen battle before, so of course his body would appear perfect. That would soon change, with the growing of his horns came the training. Something his father had obviously been excited for since the day of his birth.

Taurus didn't want to learn how to fight. He didn't like the idea of hurting someone, even if they deserved it. He snorted, how un-Qunari.

Suddenly, his pointed ears pricked up. Something was moving in the trees nearby. Something close, something large. He sniffed the air. Whatever it was, it smelt of blood and death. He slowly crept back into the shadows, he couldn't fight, but boy could he run.

There wasn't a need though. Out from the trees, a large four legged beast stepped. The catlike creature sniffed the air, sensing it was not alone. It eyes stopped on the Kossith boy hidden barely within the bushes. It took a seat, declaring it was either unfazed or curious with its company.

Taurus stepped forward. He hadn't seen an animal like this before. Its large ears pointed upward as it focused on the boy, who slowly moved closer and closer. He held out a hand, as if inviting the beast to approach.

"Hello." He quietly said. "Don't be afraid. I won't hurt you. As long as you won't hurt me." His voice was calming, soothing and neutral. A trait well known for with his kind. The cat's ears twitched.

He crouched before the animal, now showing himself to be equal with the creature. The cat remained still. He smiled, trying to reassure further he was no threat. The beast cocked its head, Taurus did the same. The beast snorted, clearly not amused by the exchange. The boy near laughed, but didn't out of respect.

"Do you live around here?" he asked. "Do you have a family? Were you hunting tonight? Catch anything good?"

The boy knew he would receive no answer, but continued to ask regardless. It wasn't often he was granted a chance to speak with someone other than his family. Even if it was a wild animal. The cat's ears pricked up once more, with a quick jerk it looked past the boy. With a quiet hiss, the beast leapt back into the direction it came from. Taurus quickly realized he was not alone.

"Imekari, why are you out so late?" a soothing voice asked, not a hint of anger in it. Taurus froze. He was not afraid of the animal, but he was certainly afraid now.

"I-I was just…" he lowered his head. "I needed some fresh air…"

"Couldn't sleep, my little Adaar?" she asked stepping closer to her son. "Still, I wish you wouldn't wander late at night."

"I am sorry, Mamma." He cringed, he didn't like it when she called him by his true name. "Are you angry?"

"No, my dearest." She shook her head. Taurus turned and looked up into the pale, stone like face of the woman who birthed him. He had long ago been told if he was born within the Qun, he never would have known her under any other description. "Just concerned."

"I am sorry… my head was hurting again…" he murmured to his feet. His mother stepped forward, with her scarred hand she began gently rubbing her son's scaly forehead. A sight which would have made any fully-fledged Qunari cringe.

"I know, my little one." She soothed. "Come, let us return home. We are not safe here, not anymore." She took her boys hand and led him back to the house.

"Mamma… how did you know I was here?" he looked up. Her lip twitched. Taurus had never seen his parent's smile, another price that came with the life they were born into. But their eyes and certain movements would sometimes betray their feelings.

"No, little Ash did not tell me." Her voice still neutral. "I was out this night on my own. I noticed someone sneak from their bedroom, and come this way." She looked down to him. "You soon won't be able to do that, you know little Adaar."

"I know." He sighed. "And I will have to use a Sata-kas… just like Pa."

"You do not want to learn how to fight?" above her eye twitched. "Why is that little one?"

"I don't want to hurt anyone… ever… why do I have to fight?"

"Because, little Adaar, we have to survive. Someday you will learn, our kind are not welcome. I do not wish to hurt anyone either, my little Imekari. But… it is in my nature. I am Saarebas."

"You don't have to be." He stopped. "I chose my name, Pa chose his. We don't have to be dangerous."

"Little one," she turned to him, eyes of stone. "Your father may call himself by another name, but he was always be Arvaarad. And now, we are both Tal Vashoth. These titles will follow us to the beyond. They are not our name, they are who we are. Just as you, are my little Adaar."

"I don't want to be your 'fire thrower', Mamma." He pouted.

"You will always be the fire in my life." She did not hug her child, but kneelt down and placed her forehead against his.

"I don't want to be dangerous…" he frowned.

"I know." She nodded. "But, it is who we are. It is all we know. As long as no one disturbs us, we won't have to be. This, my child, is a luxury."

"I know…" he sighed in defeat.

"I apologies, my child, for the life you will live… will forever be hard." Her eyes went distant. "But, it is a life your father and I chose for you both, and it is a better one… Trust in me."

Taurus's eyes lingered on the hollow shells sprouting from his mother's forehead. Then down to the deep scars upon her lips. He shivered, in another life, this fate would have befallen little Ash.

"Are you cold, little Adaar?"

"No, Mamma." He shook his head.

"Then let us return, before your father awakens to see empty cots."

"Mamma?" Taurus pulled his mother's hand back, for just a moment.

"Yes, little one?"

"Can I hear the story of how you and Papa fled the Antaam?"

"Little one, do you not tire of hearing this story?" her lip twitched.

"Never." He grinned, a sight no doubt frightening to his Qunari race. "I like hearing how brave you both were."

"Brave, foolish… and tired of certainty…" her hollow voice almost sounded heavy. "Very well. But, it is a long story."

"I don't mind." He pulled his mother along.

The two walked in unison that night, returning to their temporary house. A mother Tal Vashoth, and a Saarebas no less, held the hand of her young wide-eyed child. She retold the story that night, of a dangerous venture. One that started out as rebellion, a rebellion against the torture and pain of a life the two Qunari knew only of. And eventually, grew into something more. Qunari are not designed for love, people believe. They are only designed for killing.

And yet, that young Kossith never had a dangerous bone in his body. Sadly, fate holds different paths for everyone. Taurus Adaar's path, would lead him to somewhere, beyond dangerous.

What's that? You wish to hear that story? I'm sorry my dearest one, but that is a story…. For another night.

**A/N:**

**Based in the Dragon Age Universe, some time before the Blight and the Breach. The main character is the Kossith Inquisitor as a child. **

**Just a little something I came up with on the train this morning. I have no idea about the origin story for Inquisitors in the game, but I thought of this story and kind of just rolled with it. Taurus will probably be an Inquisitor I play as. Hope people like it :) **

**Ash is a Qunari word for 'to seek'. I figure in another life Ash would become the Inquisitor, but in this play through it is Taurus who witnesses the Breach. If Ash was born in the Qun and wasn't a Seerabas I would dear say she would become a Tallis (due to her inquisitive nature)**


	2. Qunari Do Not Dance

**_Qunari Do Not Dance_**

_What's that? _

_You wish to hear another story? About the Kossith Taurus?_

_Well, alright. Maybe one more..._

Music echoed through the stone walls that made up the mighty castle. Laughter and merrymaking only seemed to add to the noise that danced about the halls. Noise, that's what it was. Especially for one who wasn't accustomed to such 'activities'. Still, it didn't seem all that unpleasant. If anything, the idea of it all was… thrilling.

Alone in his room, the Inquisitor stood with his back against the door. He stared down to the large bed, custom made to suit his giant frame. Never in his entire life, did Taurus own something so magnificent. How could he, when all he ever knew was travelling? He hadn't ever a place to call a home. How strange that in a time so ruthless, he might have finally found one.

The oxmen scratched his bare and beyond muscled chest. He snorted as his eyes landed once more on the ensemble he was to be presented in. A black tunic, with red ruffled sleeves and a tight collar, fashioned with golden buttons and swirls. He recalled mentioning buttons would be easier, otherwise the shirt would get caught over his large horns. And to finish his outfit off, matching black pants and boots. Josephine had mentioned it cost a pretty coin to have it made to fit his large frame, made by the lands best tailors. He ran a calloused hand through his spiky, snowy mane, all the while chewing his lip in thought.

"I am not wearing that…" he crossed his grey arms in protest.

Charming though the suit was, it did not suit the large man in the slightest. But then again, he had thought similar when he was practically forced to wear armour for the first time. Being a Kossith, shirts were not always enforced, especially when he was a child. It just seemed unnatural. He felt uncomfortable, like the fabric restricted him. Which, it practically did, considering not many tailored for his size. Still, he preferred to go shirtless about the Keep. Much to the discomfort of some of the inhabitants. Apparently, a shirtless Qunari was a beyond pleasing sight, or so Bull would claim.

His pointed ears perked up when he heard the polite tap on his door. Knocking was a strange custom, something that was never needed amongst his family.

"It's open." He said, without so much as taking his eyes off the cloth on his bed.

"Maker man! Don't you believe in shirts?" the suave voice asked in a tone both amused and startled.

"I am wearing pants, am I not?" Taurus chuckled. "Can I help you Dorian?"

He turned his head to greet his Tevinter friend. Friend, such an odd term used by his race. Especially when aimed at a _bas_, a _Saarebas_ no less. But, such things mattered not to the gentle hearted Kossith.

He took in his friend's appearance. White and black tunic, fine make and ruffled in the collar and sleeves. His curled moustache combed to perfection. Taurus found facial hair odd, especially when shaped. His father had a slight goatee, but it grew that way, it wasn't on purpose. He wondered why someone would intentionally make their hair shape in such a peculiar way.

"Like what you see?" Dorian did a slight twirl, all the while smirking that teasing smile he often did. Taurus chuckled.

"Good enough to eat, little _bas_." He fashioned a mock growl. A joke he had come to enjoy with his companions, especially Sera and Varric.

"Now, I thought you only at elves?" Dorian raised his eyebrow. "Regardless, I was sent by Sister Leliana to make sure you were ready… which, apparently you are not." He shot a disapproving look to the clothes laid out on the bed. "At least, I hope. You might give some of the guests an awful fright, otherwise."

Taurus did not laugh, rather his head turned to glare once more to the ridiculous clothes.

"I do not understand why we are doing this." he shrugged. "Would it not be more… strategic, to spend our resources on supplies. Rather than a…" he tried to remember the word. "Party."

Dorian laughed slightly then approached the Kossith leader. Taurus couldn't help but recall how several months ago no one would have dared such a feat. Even Bull seemed cautious of his presumed employer, given how little he knew about Taurus and his history. Having others not fear him, was a nice change.

"You have been spending too much time with Miss Pentaghast." Dorian raised an eyebrow. "I think her practical nature has rubbed off on you."

His grey cheeks darkened slightly, though Taurus was unsure why.

"I am Qunari by blood." He smirked. "It is in my nature to be… practical."

"Now, you and I both know that is untrue." Dorian smiled. "If I may be so bold-"

"Asking permission?" Taurus smirked. "That's a first."

"And, my point is made." The mage smiled. "Our ancestry may be set in stone, but our future has yet to be written."

"You sound like Leliana." Taurus snorted in amusement.

"And you are wasting time." Dorian lifted the red and black velvet up for inspection. "As interesting an experience it would be, I would rather not dress you… not without having you buy me dinner of course."

"Why must I wear it?" the Kossith pouted. "I will look like a fool."

"More than usual?"

"You know… I sometimes miss you flinching in my presence." He grinned. "Made being respected a rule, rather than a guideline."

Dorian practically thrusted the tunic at the oxmen, who caught it rather awkwardly. Being so hulking, it was often hard for Taurus to be gentle or graceful. He sometimes missed his days as a nimble child. He immediately threw the clothes back onto the bed, as if it were a deadly snake that would kill him. Dorian nearly laughed at the display.

"I will let the others know you will be out soon… better not make Vivienne wait." Dorian's words caused a grimace to form on the Inquisitors face. "That horned woman is more frightening than you or Bull put together." He chuckled as he headed for the door.

"Fine…" Taurus sighed.

"And for love of Andraste… comb your hair." Dorian tsked as he left.

Taurus stood once more as stone, staring down at the enemy laid out before him. He wondered how the _bas_ would react, should he arrive wearing only pants. Maybe shoes as well, he thought. A low growl grew in his throat.

"I am not wearing it…"

…

The Kossith Inquisitor sluggishly dragged his booted feet along the ground. He tried to buy as much time before he was forced to enter the hall. He patted his hair down, which jumped back up in protest. He huffed, he doubted his hair would be important when his horns seemed to scream out 'look at me'.

Taurus pulled on his collar. The damned thing itched like poison oak on skin. He wanted to tear it apart, which wouldn't have been too difficult. Then he recalled how happy Josephine had been when she purchased the outfit for him, he wouldn't be so disrespectful as to destroy it. His parents taught him gratitude, he wasn't some savage after all.

His face morphed into a scowl. Evidently, he felt like a savage dressed up to amuse his masters. How odd, that in this instance he was higher up in society than most attending this event. In his time as Inquisitor, the lands had eventually learned to respect his authority. Not many were happy, but they obliged nonetheless.

"You look uncomfortable." A whispery voice seemed to come from nowhere.

"That's because I am." Taurus chuckled.

Out from a shadowy corner, the small blonde boy stepped into view. It seemed like not so long ago, such an act made the Kossith warrior's skill crawl. Now, it was just a normal occurrence. One he neither feared nor despised. The boy was dressed in his usual clothes, only now he didn't wear his ratty hat. His clear eyes stared up to Taurus, curious as they always were.

"Are you not excited?" Cole asked in his usual echoed voice. "The others are. They have been looking forward to this night, for some time."

"Have you?" Taurus asked with a smile. Cole looked thoughtful for a moment.

"I think I have. Yes." He eventually nodded. "I like to see the others happy. It makes me… happy." He looked almost unsure of the word.

"It makes me happy, also." Taurus nodded. "It isn't often they can enjoy themselves."

"I think you should enjoy yourself, as well." Cole said as he tilted his head. "Though you look uncomfortable, are you happy?"

Taurus thought for a moment. The word had always felt so foreign to him. All his life, he never fully understood the emotion. His parents claimed they were happy, but nothing in their expressions made him think they spoke the truth. His thoughts fell on his memories of little Ash, his sweet sister. She seemed to be happy, something that followed her as she grew. Taurus was more inclined to question his emotions, scared they would somehow betray him. A typical Qunari fear, he thought bitterly.

"I cannot say." He eventually shrugged. "Perhaps, one day I will be able to answer that question."

"I hope so." Cole said, he flashed his usual attempt at a smile.

Perhaps this was why Taurus had come to feel somewhat kindred with this boy. It was if the spirit who inhabited him was the only being who understood the confusion Taurus endured from time to time. How odd, he thought, that he should feel connected with a spirit. Of all things.

Before Taurus had a chance to say something further, Cole vanished. The room felt as it once was. As if the boy had never arrived. Never existed. This made Taurus pity Cole, though he wasn't sure why.

Onward Taurus walked until he reached the gallant halls doors. He stopped for a moment, allowing his breathing to steady. His heart raced, though he wasn't sure why. He felt this feeling before battle on occasion, usually when the fight seemed hopeless. This wasn't a fight, so why did his heart race? Perhaps he would have felt at ease if he carried his axe with him. Though he doubted the noble _bas_ would have liked that.

"_Parshaara_." He ordered his emotions.

With a heavy sigh, the Kossith held his horned head high and opened the doors.

The room and all its occupants seemed to overwhelm him, for just a moment. The once plain hall was decorated extravagantly. The handy work of both Vivienne and Josephine, no doubt. The banisters where dressed in lovely red and golden silk. The curtains were a deep purple, to match the trimming on the table clothes. Though the sight was pleasing, Taurus couldn't help but think it a bit much.

Many heads turned to bow humbly in respect as he entered the loud room. The music continued to play, and several of the party dwellers seemed to swirl and move to it. Taurus wondered if this was what people called 'dancing'. He thought they looked funny. But happy, regardless.

"You scrub up nice!" a bright voice bounced inside his head, as an arm leaned against his side. He looked down to the blonde elf and smiled. She looked rather pleasant, he couldn't help but think. She was dressed in a lavender dress, her hair combed to some extent. She looked up and scowled. "Not a word horn head."

"I said nothing." He chuckled as she jabbed him in the ribs to silence his chuckles.

"Well good!" she smirked. "So what you think of all this?"

Taurus looked around. He noticed some of his companions faces amongst the crowed. He spied Varric, dressed handsomely as ever, chatting amongst some of the guests. Spinning another one of his tall tales no doubt. Josephine and Vivienne, both dressed as regal as ever, seemed to be discussing something of an amusing nature to Blackwall. Who, carried a rather large platter of food. Even to a Kossith's standards.

"It all seems…" he tried to find the words to describe how it all made him feel. "Normal?"

"Ha." Sera snorted. "That's one way to put it."

She patted him on the arm, then left the oxmen to his thoughts. She skipped over to a table, where the sole inhabitant was scoffing down various baked goods. Iron Bull looked up and smiled to Taurus. Who in turn, scowled at the Qunari. He had noticed Bull was not dressed according to the party's standards, rather he wore a simple fur vest. Taurus wished he was granted that same luxury. He noticed many people avoided eye contact with Bull. Taurus immediately thought he had to dress this way in order to make the other people feel at ease. The idea annoyed him slightly.

Solas stood towards the wall adjacent to the one Taurus had claimed. The bald elf dressed rather plain, but still more extravagant than he normally wore. The elf looked about as comfortable as Taurus felt, and no doubt looked. Solas noticed the Kossith's attention and nodded towards him. Taurus smiled in reply.

"You look very handsome." A flowery voice complimented. Taurus looked down to the red head. It wasn't every day one was granted the opportunity to admire her hair, considering the Spy Master barely removed her hood. This night must have been special. She didn't wear her usual uniform either, instead she fashioned a deep blue dress.

"I feel like a fool." He tugged on his leather belt.

"Well, you don't look it." Leliana smiled.

"I am sure." He grunted. "People are easier to read, than they like to think. I can see the judgement in their eyes. They are laughing at me, mocking me for trying to be something I am apparently not." He felt anger rise in his stomach. Shame.

"Do you see mockery in my eyes?"

Taurus looked once more to the Orlesian. Her clear blue eyes seemed tired, hardened. She looked sad, like the world had ended for her a long time ago. But, not a single trace of mockery could be seen. Her smile though was often fake, this night spoke with honesty.

"No, Sister. I do not." He smiled.

"Good." She nodded, her eyes returning to the crowd. She seemed intent on finding something. Of what, Taurus couldn't be certain.

Taurus watched with curiosity as the people talked and laughed, danced and sung. It came so naturally to them, he couldn't help but envy how easy this all was to some.

He noticed a tall woman, dressed in velvet red. Her dress seemed simple, and yet far more appealing than the others Taurus has noticed. The trimming was both black and gold, and she wore lace gloves. Her outfit seemed to match his own, he wondered if Josephine had planned this. That woman assumed much, but wasn't often wrong. He cocked his head as he focused on the gloves. They didn't seem practical, and yet it was apparently a fashionable choice. He continued to admire the woman. Many would think she seemed plain in comparison to others, but to Taurus, she stood out amongst all around her. This confused the Kossith.

Her black hair was pinned back, as opposed to how it normally spiked out in protest to being tamed. Her usual braid appeared to be missing that night, which explained why it seemed slightly longer. He always liked her hair, it reminded him of his mothers. His mother from time to time would allow her silvery hair to grow long, but would soon enough cut it once more. Another thing the women had in common.

She had once told him that she had long, beautiful flowing rivers of black locks. When he asked why she cut it off, she smiled grimly and said it wasn't practical. A warrior, in all aspects. He couldn't help but wonder if his father would have liked her, even if she was a _bas_.

"Why don't you go talk to her?" Leliana asked with a smile. "Or maybe ask for a dance?"

"Qunari don't dance." He grunted in reply, slightly annoyed he had been watched.

"But you are not Qunari." Leliana smirked, a rare act from the normally hardened woman. This night was indeed special.

"Perhaps." He shrugged, the fabric swished as he did so.

"So why not speak to her?"

Taurus watched with a somewhat saddened heart as he took notice on who spoke with the warrior woman. A blonde man, dressed in cotton and silk with fur trimming, practical like the man was. A man whom Taurus hadn't a chance in comparing. It was obvious human women found looks more important than character, and Cullen had both in high numbers. Who would choose a Kossith over him? Oxmen, were not all that appealing.

"Because." He said bluntly. "She can do better."

Leliana sighed, a small smile touched her lips.

"You remind me of someone." She said peacefully. "Why is it, all the good ones doubt themselves?"

"Is that what your people call a rhetorical question?" Taurus asked with a frown.

"Somewhat." She chuckled. "You remind me of someone, in more ways than one it would seem."

Taurus wondered who he reminded her off. She had mentioned many times she travelled with a Qunari during the Blight. But, it couldn't be the Sten of her stories that was alike to Taurus. Sten, or now rather the Arishok, was a man of the Qun. Something Taurus never was or would be.

"Who do I remind you of?" he finally asked.

Leliana's eyes seemed to continue to search for something or someone. She scanned the crowd of people. Finally, her eyes lit up and a grin spread to her cheeks. Taurus followed her gaze. A man, with thick raven hair and dressed in deep blue, stood by one of the halls windows. Taurus could not see his face, for he wore a mask just as some of the other partiers wore. Even still, he could see the man light up as he too noticed the Sister.

Leliana turned to Taurus. For a moment, Taurus thought she looked younger. Happier. As if she was in a time when the world didn't seem hopeless. He wondered, if this was what true happiness looked like.

"You remind me, of someone... dear to my heart."

"Your Kadan?" Taurus asked unsurely. This was the only word he knew that would sum up what she described. It was what his mamma and papa called each other. She smiled.

"I guess so." She turned to look to the masked stranger once more.

With that, the Spy Master excused herself and rushed through the crowd. Taurus watched with great curiosity as she reached the far side of the room. Leliana leapt into the man's arms, embracing him as if she feared he would vanish.

His eyes averted away from Leliana and her companion, feeling it not his place to watch. Rather, he searched once more for the woman in red. It didn't take long, she had barely moved from her original place. Sighing heavily, Taurus tried to flatten his spikey white hair, then made sure his clothes were presentable. As presentable as a Kossith in human fashion might seem.

With a purposeful stride, he made his way throw the crowd. He bowed his head respectfully as people addressed him. Several of the nobles wished to make small talk, which he politely declined. They seemed somewhat flattered that he had excused himself, clearly not expecting someone of such acclaim to be polite. Or rather, someone of his race to act that way.

It felt like a year had passed by the time he reached the woman. His heart continued to thump, as if his death was just a stone's throw away. Cullen noticed Taurus and bowed.

"Ah, Inquisitor." He addressed, proper and respectful as ever. One of the reasons Taurus liked him. Despite his past with Qunari and living as a Templar, Cullen held no ill will towards Bull or Taurus. Nor any mages, for that fact. "I hope you are enjoying the night."

"Indeed, I think I am." Taurus bowed. "Please, if you would excuse me, I have to speak with the Seeker." He spoke businesslike, feeling his tongue knew nothing better.

Cullen smiled and bowed once more. An act the man seemed to do frequently, a trait picked up in his time with the Chantry, no doubt. He casted Taurus a seemingly knowing look, then made his exit. This allowed Taurus's attention to focus fully on the woman before him.

Cassandra looked up. Though she smiled, Taurus could see the discomfort in her eyes. He smiled as he took in the sight of her beauty. Unlike most of the woman there, she did not wear makeup. Her cheek's scar shone proudly on her slender face. A scar, Taurus was curious the origin of. She never wished to speak on the matter, so he never pressed. Though, he always found it a very attractive feature on her face. Not that he didn't find the rest of her face appealing. He couldn't help but feel the need to chuckle, surely his ancestors would feel disturbed to know such a fact.

"Is something the matter, Inquisitor?" Cassandra asked, worry in her voice as a frown touched her forehead.

"No!" Taurus near shouted as he realised he might have been staring. "I just um…." Words failed him.

Cassandra seemed to fidget with her hands, Taurus wondered if she was uncomfortable or nervous. He hoped for the latter, as it meant he wasn't a complete fool. He often found speaking with the Seeker frustrating, as it wasn't hard to upset her. Something he had regretfully done from time to time. Though, with time Cassandra seemed to warm up to the Kossith's blunt sense of humour.

"You look lovely." He finally said. "No, that is inadequate. What is the term your people use? Beautiful? Radiant?" he pulled on his collar, feeling foolish once more.

"In most cases, both can be accepted as a compliment." She blushed slightly. "Thank you, Inquisitor. And you look rather dashing this evening."

"As opposed to going without a shirt?" he raised an eyebrow. "I am offended being half naked isn't considered to this events standards."

"Regardless, you do look handsome." she chuckled, a sound Taurus had come to enjoy. As rare as it was

"Not my choice, but I am glad I do not look foolish." He smiled. "I thank you, Seeker." He bowed humbly.

"Seems we were both roped into this." she nearly groaned. "You do not look foolish." She added with a smile. "I worry that I look more the fool. I don't think I have the… physique, for this type of dress…"

"That is false." Taurus said with a grin. "I think your… physique is perfect, Seeker."

Casandra blushed. A sight Taurus once thought impossible when it came to the stoic warrior. But as of late, the sight became more frequent. It seemed they both had a softer side, one only saved for certain people. Taurus felt honoured to be one of the lucky few.

"Are you enjoying yourself?" she eventually asked.

"It is not something I would normally partake in… but, it seems to be alright." He shrugged. "Given the company I keep, it seems to more than alright."

"Not much of a party person, myself." Her eyes watched the other people, both with curiosity and embarrassment. "Despite having once been part of this life… I seem to have lost the knack for it."

"If it is not true to who you are, it can be easily forgotten." Taurus joined in watching the dancing. "Something my father taught me."

"He is a wise man." Cassandra smiled.

Taurus had to resist the urge to correct her. He was a wise man.

"You know, I find this more terrifying than fighting a dragon." She chuckled.

"I find that hard to believe." Taurus smirked. "Thinking you fear anything is indeed difficult to understand. Given how forceful you were the day we met."

"You will never let that go, will you?" Cassandra frowned, though she seemed amused.

"Nope. I think you still owe me for holding a sword to my throat. Not many have done so and survived, you are very fortunate."

"Am I now?" she chuckled. "You still think you could have defeated me?"

"Seeker, I do not think… I know." He grinned.

"You are very cocky, Inquisitor."

"It comes with the job."

The two stood in silence for a few moments. Content with watching the others dance. Taurus noticed sadness pass over Cassandra's face. He wondered what she was thinking about, but decided against asking.

"Would you care to… dance?" he asked, confidence vanished.

"I… I don't dance." Casandra shook her head, slightly embarrassed.

"Neither do I." he smiled as he presented his hand.

Cassandra hesitated for a moment. She looked at the large grey hand unsurely. Then after a moment of contemplation, she took it. Taurus smiled as her hand met with his.


	3. Qunari Do Not Choose

**_Qunari Do Not Choose_**

_I'm sure by now you are wondering why I wish to retell these tales to you? _

_Well, it is my greatest hope, that with hearing these stories, you will have a better understanding of their people._

_It is, in my understanding, that not many in our world would care to even try to know the Qunari race. That they label them all as monsters, when that is not the case. _

_Those that do know of the Qunari race, know only of their brutal beliefs. It is said, a Qunari is born into a role, and that is the end of that. A warrior, is a warrior. Cold, calculating, and relentless._

_A Qunari, remains that bestowed role until the day they die. Choice, is neither an option, nor a right._

_Well, I wish to tell you about one, who chose. _

The suns final rays began to slowly creep behind the mountains. The forest grew increasingly darker with each passing moment, which only made the large Tal Vashoth wish to pick up his pace. These woods were not safe during the day for his kind. But, unlike those that would hunt him, night time was the fearsome brute's domain. A Qunari, though large, could slip in and out of the darkness. He could be like smoke, if he chose.

But, not this night. He was no killer out to hunt his prey. No, on this night, he was a simple father taking his young son out on a personal quest. Regardless, he kept a hand firmly on his swords pummel. Tal, was no fool.

Yet, on this night, his enemies were the least of his concerns. His biggest fear, remained at home, no doubt curled by the fire. He didn't feel up to answer to his heavily pregnant Kadan as to why he kept their son out late, especially without shoes. He sighed as he recalled that he probably should have set an example on that rule. But, she should have been proud that both her loved ones decided to wear their woollen tunics. Much to Tal's distress; he itched at the annoying fabric.

Still, Tal knew his son would enjoy the surprise he had arranged, which made the prospect of a disappointed mate almost worthwhile. His Kadan would understand if they were slightly late. But, Tal knew they needed to return sooner rather than later. He disliked the idea of leaving his Kadan alone for too long. Being heavy with child, her magic was somewhat unstable, especially with her mood swings.

Luckily, she wasn't as uncontrolled as she was when she had Adaar. Tal's nostrils flared in amusement as he recalled his mate flinging fireballs at random spiders, or flying off the hinge whenever something bothered her. Given her normally calm nature, the mood swings were often terrifying to Tal… if not slightly arousing. Which the once Arvaarad found confusing, given the idea of magic was once a forbidden thought. But, he had long since adjusted to bedding a mage, and even longer since he had actually come to love said mage. She was his Kadan, and always had been.

Still, her pregnancy was a very trying time for both of the stoic beings. Saare would act like an untamed fire; hence the reasoning behind their first born name. Even the mentioning of Tal's given name for her, a shorted version of her once title amongst the Qun, was enough to set her off. Unlike Tal, Saare had found adjusting to their new life… trying.

At least the second pregnancy seemed easier on his Kadan. She seemed calmer, almost overly. She seemed sluggish and terribly tired half the time. Which, was a worrying thought, given she would be vulnerable if attacked.

This sudden realisation caused the oxmen to pick his pace up more. He felt guilty once more for leaving her unattended. But still, this outing had been her suggestion.

He looked over his toned shoulders and spied his young son stumble about aimlessly, the boy so content with his surroundings to even care where they were going. Tal sighed, his little Adaar was always so easily distracted.

"Keep up, little Imekari." The large Tal Vashoth called back gently. His thunderous voice booming through the woods.

"Where are we going Pa?" the young lad picked up his pace, realising his father was some ways ahead.

"You shall see when we reach our destination." The big man slowed to allow his young sons legs to keep pace. "Are you feeling tired? Did you wish to ride on my shoulders, young one?"

"No Pa, I don't need to." The little boy puffed his chest out. "I don't get tired."

The large oxman felt pride twinge his heart. In some ways, he saw a lot of himself in his son. That similar big-headed nature, and overly confident stride, all things the Qun attempted to break from Tal as a boy. Only, Adaar was far stronger and braver, even if he was only five yearly cycles old. Adaar also shared the gentle nature his mother inhabited, something Tal was not very skilled in.

"Still, we may be late." He almost smiled as he gently lifted his son up and carried him atop his large horns.

"But I'm not tired." His son protested, a tiny struggling yawn escaped his mouth. "Not one bit."

"I know my little fire thrower, I know."

"Why do you always call me that?" Tal could hear the pout in his son's voice. "You and Ma?"

"Because, that is your name."

"My name is Adaar though." The boy sounded almost defensive.

"That is what Adaar means." Tal's lip quirked up. "Fire thrower, or weapon."

"But… I'm not a weapon." Adaar sounded offended at the very idea.

"Others may think differently." Tal snorted. "Do you not like your name?"

"I do." Adaar's nodding made Tal's horns vibrate. "But… it doesn't suit me, not completely."

"Well…" Tal sighed. "I suppose, it is only fare… I chose my name, so if you truly disliked the name your mother and I picked, you are more than allowed to change it."

"Would you and Ma be angry?" Adaar seemed to think on the prospect.

"No." Tal lied. He was certain his Kadan would probably scold him for allowing their overly creative boy chose his own name. "So long as you don't call yourself something ridiculous."

"Okay Pa." Adaar sounded excited. "But, can I keep Adaar as my name, as well?"

"I thought you wished to change it?" Tal frowned.

"No, I want to keep it. You and Ma named me that, it is my name, but I want another name." Adaar's little legs swung back and forth gently batting against his father's barrelled chest. "I heard some of the bas in town call each other two names, I want two as well."

"You aren't a bas though, little Imekari." Tal grunted. "But… if that is what you wish, then it is your choice…. _Meravas_, it is your decision to make."

Tal walked on in silence, listening to his son's slight chatter as he pointed at various things that lurked in the woods. He couldn't help but enjoy the sounds of his son's speech, it was a unique sound to the once Arvaarad. Given his role in the Qun, Tal had never had experiences with children, least of all his own. He felt his heart grow heavy, he often wondered what became of his other children that were raised in the Qun.

"Pa?" Adaar peeped into his father's ear. "Did you hear me Pa?"

"No, sorry my little one."

"I asked why I don't have horns like you." His son began tapping lightly on his father's horns.

"Because you are only young." Tal answered truthfully. "They will grow soon enough."

"Can… can I not have horns?"

"Sometimes our people are born hornless, but it is very rare." Tal lifted his head up, attempting to look into his son's eyes. "Do you not want horns, Imekari?"

Adaar looked away. His already grey cheeks darkened slightly as he felt embarrassed for having spoken on such things in the first place. Tal felt slightly worried, his son was rarely quiet.

"What troubles you?" he frowned.

"If… If I don't grow horns, will other children like me?" Adaar asked truthfully.

Tal lowered his head, attempting to think of an answer to give his wide eyed son. In truth, being hornless wouldn't really help a Qunari with 'fitting in' when it came to living amongst Bas. Their skin colour, facial structure and hulking size were all indications they did not belong in this world, a world over run by tiny people. Horns, was the least of the young Vashoth's worries.

"I cannot say, my son." Tal sighed. "I do not know well enough of bas, to answer you."

Lying wasn't something Tal was used to. Living in the Qun, every question was answered wholeheartedly; blunt and brutal. It was one of the many things the Tal Vashoth had grown tired of enduring. Lying wasn't a good thing, that much Tal understood, but he preferred that from breaking his innocent son's heart. He wanted his son to be different from others in their race, to have a chance.

His son was not Tal Vashoth, not in his father's eyes. He was something new, a fresh beginning. Adaar, was a Kossith. He was born and raised away from the Qun, and from the brutal ways of the Tal Vashoth mercenaries' that believed their way was 'free'. Both Qunari and Vashoth were slaves to their race. Kossith, were free. Adaar, was free.

"I don't want horns…" Adaar murmured sadly.

Tal felt his heart sink as he heard his tiny boy's revelation. Given the size of Tal's, it would probably be a very rare occurrence if he had produced a child unable to grow horns.

"You know, my son," Tal attempted to lighten to mood. "Where I was born, having horns was a sign of greatness." Tal disliked speaking of his life in the Qun, but if it helped his son cope, he would.

"Why?"

"Because, the horns make us look larger. Fearsome, powerful and unstoppable. Some believe we resemble Atashi, and the bigger our horns the greater the likeness. When a male grew large horns, he was considered stronger than others. Usually, the leader of our race was a Qunari born with exceptional horns, but not always. Sometimes-"

"What's an a-a-atashee, Pa?" Tal felt his little one tweak his horns slightly.

"A dragon, Adaar. Like those in the stories I tell." Tal felt his lip curl upwards slightly. Though he was still growing accustomed to being 'fatherly', he was at least good when it came to entertaining his son.

"Oh… Why would anyone want to look like a dragon?" Young Adaar squeaked in almost shock. "Dragons are big, mean and scary…"

"Some people would say the same of us, little one." He grunted in amusement. "It is befitting, that we resemble them."

"I don't think we are scary…" Adaar grumbled in annoyance.

"I know, little one." Tal sighed in defeat. His son was too young to understand, and Tal was certain by the time he was old enough to, the boy would choose to disagree. Which, made the old Tal Vashoth proud, choice was something he wanted for his kin.

"Maybe I won't grow horns… Maybe I'll be like Ma."

Tal felt pain grip his heart. Its icy claws dug deep, causing the oxmen's breathing to hitch slightly. He thought back to his Kadan, her scarred grey lips, laceration marks around her neck from where her leash once was… the hollow sprouts from which her beautiful horns once grew. His heart thumped loudly against his grey chest, memories came flooding back. Memories of a time before he knew of freedom, a time of obedience and command. A time, when he held his Kadan's leash.

"Pa?" Adaar gently ran his hands through his father's snowy locks. Tal quickly calmed himself, realising he was shaking like a frightened Dathrasi.

"Your mother did have horns… once…" Tal bit his lip in supressed anger.

"She did?" Adaar squeaked in surprise. "Why doesn't she have any now?"

"They… were removed…" Tal's pace slowed as he felt physically heavy with guilt.

"Why?"

Tal's sharp and strong teeth bit down hard against his grey lips, he felt the bitter taste as a few drops of blood escaped the mark.

"Because, she was…" Tal racked his brain, trying to think of a way to understand the complex and confusing ways of their people. "Where we came from, having no horns is a sign of fear. It symbolises difference, standing alone amongst a people that is one."

"Because most Qunari have horns?"

"Yes." Tal nodded. "When a Qunari is born this way, they are feared and respected. Some, even revered. It is believed that the Kossith people once had no horns, but somewhere along the way… we changed. We grew stronger."

"But why did they remove Ma's horns? Because she was special?"

"In a way…" Tal felt guilt gnaw at his stomach. "But, mostly because she was dangerous. It was a way for people to know this, to fear her… But, without her horns, she was also respected. It meant she accepted her role."

"But-"

"No more, my little Adaar." Tal sighed, his heart beyond heavy. "I do not wish to speak more of our people… No more, at least for tonight."

"Yes, Pa."

Tal reached his large calloused hand above his head, he tussled his boys shaggy mane playfully. The child giggled at the minor sign of affection. He desperately wished he could give his son the answers he needed. Perhaps one day, but not then. Not while he was so young, and not while Tal still healed from his agony.

Tal looked up to find they had finally reached their destination, much to his aching backs delight. Tal had grown slightly soft in his days away from both the Qun and the Tal Vashoth mercenary companies. This could not be, he had to remain strong. For his precious family.

"We are here, little one." He lifted his son up and placed him down on the ground.

Adaar looked about, they had entered a large clearing, where the tall trees reached up and touched the sky. The sky, which was now completely covered with thousands and thousands of stars.

"Wow…" the little grey child grinned in awe as he craned his neck.

Tal almost smiled, but instead took a seat beside his twirling boy. He felt the cool tickle of the slightly damp grass brush against his scarred hands, the sensation helped him relax.

Adaar finished spinning about in his wondrous state and took a seat overly close beside his father. Tal began pointing up to the stars, retelling the constellations he could recall. He had chosen this particular spot for a strategic purpose; this field was able to see majority of the constellations that spread across all of Thedas. Tal had been scouting the area, just for this purpose.

"That one there son, is called Fenrir." He pointed towards the north of the sky. "It means 'White Wolf', the constellation was originally found in Tevinter." Tal felt sick mentioning the place. "The elves of this nation say it represents one of their many false Gods. And that one, that one is Eluvia."

"What does that one mean, Pa?" Adaar gushed in amazement of his father's knowledge.

"I believe this particular constellation's origin has been lost through translation." He grunted in annoyance. "Arguments between Orlesian scholars and Tevinter Imperium _vashedan's_ have been carrying on through decades. One says it represents some false and forgotten God, the others say it is some foolish story about someone going to the stars…"

"And that one?" Adaar gleefully pointed west.

"That is Toth." Tal snorted in annoyance. "Yet another one named after a forgotten God. It means fire dragon."

"That's cool!" Adaar beamed. Tal looked lopsided to his son.

"Fire isn't normally known to be cold…" he shook his head. " That one is Krios, another supposed God. And that one is Draconis. Can you guess what that one means?"

"Is it… dragon?" Adaar chewed his lip. "Or a Tevinter God?"

"Both correct." He grunted in amusement. "It means High Dragon, as for being Tevinter that is up for debate."

"How do you know all this?" Adaar gushed.

"I chose to study it, when I lift Par Vollen with your mother." Tal's eyes twinkled. "I had always found the stars fascinating, as you do now. But, I was never allowed to think more on them in the Qun, it wasn't my place to know or care…"

Adaar looked to the sky, almost disappointed. His little grey lip puckered and he sighed heavily. Tal worried, he didn't like it when his son showed strange emotions, and it stressed him.

"Is something wrong?" Tal's nostrils flared. "Are you hurt? Sick? Tired? Hungry?"

"Pa… why is there no Qunari or Kossith constellations?" Adaar continued to pout. "They are all Tevinter… why aren't our Gods in the sky?"

Tal felt instantly relaxed knowing his son was fine.

"Qunari do not worship God's, my son. Especially made up ones." Tal placed a strong hand on his son's shoulder. "As for Tevinter origins, their scholars simply found these star clusters and took claim over them."

"Do our people have different names for them?" Adaar looked up, his eyes growing wider with hope.

"No son." His eyes fell. "Our people, do not really worry over such trivial things. We took note of what other places called them, catalogued it, then moved on. The names seemed suitable enough, I suppose."

"Oh…" Adaar looked forlorn to the earth.

Tal watched his son, he felt he had let him down. Tal had sworn before Adaar was born he would do away with his past life, forget the Qun and all its painful lessons. Like many who had betrayed their race before him, he had taken a name and forgotten his purpose. And yet, he felt disappointed in himself for not being able to provide some form of a purpose and culture to pass onto his own flesh and blood.

Suddenly, he recalled something. His ears perked up and his lip twitched with excitement.

"Actually, there is one constellation." Adaar looked up. "One that is known amongst our people. It represents us, in a way. It symbolises strength, a force of power and pride. It is as older than our very existence. Some believe it is why our people chose to grow horns, to become strong, just as this constellation was."

"What is it?"

Tal lifted his free hand and pointed to the furthest cluster of stars to the east. The stars were far away, further than those of the Tevinter origin, but they were still noticeable. Hiding even, waiting for a chance to be noticed. Adaar's eyes grew with wonder as the shape of the horned beast came into sight.

"It is called Taurus, the Great Bull." Tal felt his heart lift as he saw the look of pride on his sons face. "Just as you, my son, will grow to become a great man. You are strong, like the Bull. Yet, you are patient, just as he is. A bull is a noble creature, even in our culture. They protect those that follow it, and run down those that oppose. The mighty guardian, the fierce horned beast, the patient protector."

"How is he patient, Pa?"

"Because, like our people, he waits. He waits for the world to notice him, and yet he is content with being unseen. Because, as he lays dormant amongst those who seem more powerful, he grows stronger, fiercer. And to those that threaten him, he raises his mighty horns, and runs them down like a relentless force."

"So… we are like him… because we are patient and strong… and have horns…" Adaar added with a childish snicker.

"Yes, son. That too." Tal snorted. "But come little one, we must return to your mother."

Adaar let out a large groan in protest, but didn't struggle when his father perched him once more atop his horns.

As Tal stomped through the woods he felt his son grow heavy with sleep. He heard the occasional sigh as the child fought back resting. Tal felt his core warm with love as Adaar snuggled into his strong head, legs dangling around his father's shoulders.

"Taurus…" Adaar yawned. "I like that name…"


	4. Qunari Do Not Change

**Qunari Do Not Change**

_Magic; in all stories it is seen as a burden. A curse even._

_It is in our lands that we are only just learning to accept it. Learning that one who wields it is no less a person. That it is their actions that define who they are, not what they were born into. Still, there will always be fear._

_But, what many forget is that in some places Magic is seen as the greatest evil. That it cannot even be used as a tool, not without its costs. That it is better off destroyed. Magic is an imperfection. It must be erased. _

_In the Qun, magic is the ultimate test of their faith. A tool must always be used, and never wasted. And so, they are forced to do the unspeakable. A mage is bound, chained like an animal. _

_Why? Because they are dangerous. A weapon, a monster. Designed for one purpose, to destroy. As barbaric as you and I may see the way Qunari treat their own, we must also understand that it is sometimes beyond help. A weapon must be used for its purpose, that cannot be changed._

_Well… I knew one who defied this. One, who changed her purpose…_

It was just another typical summer's day, as typical as was expected. The sun shone brightly and the wind had a slight gentle breeze too it; the perfect weather that any child would gladly flock to. It was perfect for outdoors playing, for rough and tumble.

And so, Tal chose to take his children outside. Away from his son's studies, much to his mother's disapproval. The warrior disguised play lazily as training, but Saarebas wasn't fooled by her Kadan's 'clever' methods. Still, she didn't mind all too much. He was right, such a day should not have been wasted. He carried their youngest around almost carefree; not fearing the fragile nature of such a young babe. Little Ash had only just begun to hold her head up alone, and the way her father flung her about was setting Saarebas on edge. Tal was always more at ease with the children, so she tended to leave him to his ways. She envied how he was with them.

Saarebas sat to attention outside the rundown cottage her Kadan had come to own. It was the fourth house the Qunari family had occupied in the past year; Saarebas couldn't help but wonder how many more they would come to stay in. With a heavy sigh, she rested her aching head against a banister; she watched intently as Adaar attempted to head-butt his father, while little Ash watched with amazement. The scene was blissful, and she felt calm being allowed the opportunity to watch. Let alone be apparently part of the whole thing. Family, she had never had such a thing. Even before becoming Saarebas, she was raised like all other children in the Qun. It was how she knew Tal before his training, how the two were once friends. Looking back, the scene that day seemed like a distant and foolish dream of a silly little girl. She shouldn't have even had a partner, let alone children. It seemed not all that long ago when the very idea of children… was forbidden…

A Saarebas was not permitted such an honour. Her blood was tainted, impure. She was impure. The offspring would be abominations. If the Qun knew what she had created... No, she couldn't think on that. Wouldn't allow it.

A shiver ran down her body, memories came flooding back as they always did when she didn't focus on the present day. It was hard for her at times, to block out the sounds of her own screaming. Her hands clenched as she could feel hot iron. The feeling of being suffocated as a burning leash was chained around her, bounding all that she was inside. The stinging needle as it thread through a child's lips. Scars that would never heal. Burning that would never go away as her horns were permanently removed, brutally and without mercy. Everyone would know what she was, the shame she had become. They called the act an honour; it didn't feel that way. But she accepted it.

Saarebas's nostrils flared. Instinctively, she raised a hand up to trace the jagged scars through her lips, the hollow curves that would forever mark her for what she was. She was Saarebas, not Saare. Saare was a loving name her Kadan wished to grant, a name not a title. But she couldn't be that, not yet anyway.

Tal, her loving and dear Kadan, tried desperately to help free her from the chains. He was the one who broke free from the Qun's hold, rescuing her. But, he was too late in the end, she feared. She couldn't help but wonder what had possessed Tal that day to free her, what forbidden magic had taken over his stoned heart. He was Arvaarad. He was her captor and leader, he held her chains and was meant to guard her from escaping or being corrupted. In the end, he was the one who was corrupted. He was tainted, but not by magic. The man claimed something stronger took hold over him; he claimed he felt something that the Qun didn't really share for one person. It was the day he called her Kadan.

"Mamma?"

She snapped out of her thoughts, her mind was such a fragile thing and so easily caught off balance. Blinking back the fog of her memories, she looked down to spy her eldest. The boy looked up worriedly, the concern radiated as always through his pale eyes. It was so strange for the Saarebas to see this child; a child that was so entirely Tal, and yet still herself. But, unique, in his own little way. A perfect creation, spawned from imperfection and misery.

His baggy clothes were covered in dirt, shoes long forgotten in the rough play. His hair was twisted and scruffy, the length rendered the boy unable to see without constantly brushing it from his face. It shone magnificently against his grey skin, the different tones of silver made him look all the more precious to Saarebas.

"Yes, my little one." Her eyelids fluttered slightly.

She tried her best to mask the pain that ached inside, a pain that never dulled. She felt empty, when she desperately craved to feel whole. She needed to, for her children's sake.

"Can I sit with you?" the boy sighed.

"Of course." Her lips twitched slightly. She sometimes wished desperately she could smile. "Do you not wish to play anymore?"

"Train." He puffed his chest out.

"Yes. Apologises." She snorted in amusement, a tiny sound only for her son to hear.

"I'm a little tired." He sighed again. "And Pa wanted to train Ash."

"Oh?"

"Yeah." Adaar rolled his eyes, such an odd gesture. "She is a baby. She can't do much, I told him."

"Given the chance, she may surprise." Saarebas's eyes twinkled.

"That's what Pa said."

"Your father is a wise man, little Adaar." Saarebas nodded.

"Ma…" he groaned. "Taurus, remember."

"Of course." Saarebas sighed slightly.

Adaar slumped to the floor heavily, his lips stuck out in annoyance. Strangely, and yet naturally, Saarebas began to run her fingers through his long silver hair, attempting desperately and timidly to untangle the few knots. It was due to be cut, but Saarebas liked when her little one allowed it to grow. It reminded her of the styles of their people. Silly that she should care, but still she did.

He leaned back into her touch; the child had grown accustomed to a life of limited contact with his mother. It was obvious he enjoyed what little he was graced with. Saarebas's heart hurt at the thought; how terrible of a mother she surely was.

Saarebas looked up to watch for a moment as her Kadan allowed their youngest to ride atop his shoulders. He held her firmly in place, there was no danger when she was in his care. The tiny babe giggled and clapped; a talent she had recently developed and come to relish. Saarebas wanted to smile at the sight; to show how much she loved being gifted with such a family. To anyone watching perhaps they appeared like a normal family, a happy family. She hoped they truly were, her children deserved as much.

"Ash said her first words before." Her son looked up and beamed.

"Oh?" Saarebas spoke casually, but the glint in her eyes surely gave away her excitement.

"Yeah." He giggled. "She said 'da'."

"That is more a sound, than a word Imekari." She let out an amused breath.

"Nope. She was talking to Papa." The boy beamed with utter pride. "She was saying Da, like Pa. It's another name for him."

"You sound certain of that."

"I am." He grinned. "I hope she says my name soon."

"Adaar is a little trickier than da, little one."

"Taurus." He pouted.

"Apologises." Saarebas sighed.

In all honesty, she respected her mate's decision to allow their child the choice in his own name. She just found it difficult to understand. Naming her children at all was a difficult task; and she almost despised it. She felt conflicted; her name was a role, and she was not meant to give such a title to others. Naming was so… strange to her.

She should have been grateful her son wanted his own name, but she was confused with why she didn't entirely like it. Perhaps, it was as if the name given wasn't good enough? That she had failed to begin with. Tal seemed to find adjustment outside the Qun easier and found the concept of names more familiar. He never seemed to belong in that world, never fit quite right. He was too curious, even as he grew. Always asked more than needed, questioned his worth. It wasn't until his first re-education, did he learn to keep such thoughts inside.

Still, Saarebas wished she could become free, just as he was. She wished she could become his Saare, be the Kadan he deserved and the mother her children craved. She had hoped with the birth of her daughter Ash, things would have been easier.

She tuned in once more to the present; her son spoke quickly about things she didn't quite understand. Games he wished to play with Tal, lessons he would teach his baby sister, adventures he knew they would both share. She nodded along, listening but preferring to remain silent. Speaking freely was still foreign to her. Though she had been outside the Qun for almost seven years, she had only recently grown accustomed to speaking her mind.

"Mamma…" once more her son interrupted her thoughts. "Can I ask you something?"

"You always can, little one."

"Why doesn't anyone like me?" he hung his head.

"I do not understand." She frowned. "Your father and I do. And your baby sister."

"I know that…" he sighed in annoyance. "I mean… other people… I don't know why… Maybe I did something wrong?"

"I-I don't understand…"

"Everyone doesn't like me." His voice grew shaky. "Everyone who is different from me…"

"Different?" her frown deepened in confusion.

"Anyone who doesn't look like me…" he sighed, picking at a loose thread on his pants.

"You mean… bas?" Adaar nodded.

Saarebas thought for a moment; how could she explain something so difficult, in a way that seemed simple. How could she explain to a child that the world saw him as a monster?

"Who doesn't like you, little one?" Saarebas attempted to get the full story. "Specifically?"

"The other children… in the village." His lip trembled. "I was playing the woods this morning-"

"You know you shouldn't wander off alone." Her voice wavered in stress. "It is dangerous, Adaar."

"I know mama… I'm sorry…" tears welled as he looked up in fear. "I shouldn't have gone out there…"

"What happened?" she grit her teeth, seeing her child's anguish. "Did someone hurt you?"

"No…. yes…" he hiccupped as tears began to escape. "The other children, they saw me. I asked if they wanted to play… they called me a filthy savage, a monster. Some kept doing this with their fingers…" he lifted his hands up to symbol horns. "They mooed at me mama, like I was an animal…"

"And-and what did you do?" her stomach flipped as the story unfolded.

"I didn't do anything." He shook his head. "I was scared… that's why I didn't tell Papa… I didn't want him to be angry…"

"He wouldn't have, little one." Saarebas felt pained. "He wouldn't be angry at you when you did nothing wrong."

"I must have Mamma!" he cried out. "Why else did they do that? They yelled and me and kept calling me mean names… And-and they threw rocks at me…"

He lifted his fringe up slightly, revealing a rather deep and nasty gash. Saarebas saw red, her hands twitched viciously, nostrils flaring. Her child was hurt, she failed to protect him. No, this wasn't her fault. It was the filthy bas, bas who knew nothing of her son's nature. How gentle he was, how pure. They could hate Saarebas, that was what was expected. She was a monster, but not her son. Not her precious baby.

"What did I do Mamma…?" he wept. "Why do they hate me?"

Saarebas felt her heart break as she saw the pain and confusion in her child's eyes. She wasn't built for this, wasn't designed to handle this task. She was a weapon, she wasn't designed to love. Her hand hovered nervously above his head, she almost patted her own child some stray animal. She felt disgusted, no better than the cruel children that called him a beast.

Instead, Saarebas did something she never thought she was capable of doing. She picked her small child up, and cradled him in her arms. She froze, as did he. But then, the boy sobbed and bundled into his mother's arms. And Saarebas's hardened heart melted. She held him as tight as possible without hurting him, just enough to show she cared. As his tiny heartfelt sobs fell, she hushed him and cooed lovingly. An act so completely alien to her, and yet it came… naturally.

"You did nothing, my little one…" she sighed, pressing her head against his.

"Then why did they hurt me?" he trembled, nuzzling in more.

"Because…" she paused, unsure herself how to sum up the reasoning behind such blatant hate. "They do not understand. They saw you as Qunari. They saw you as a threat that their parents warned them of."

"Why?" he mumbled into her chest.

"Because, our kind… are something to be feared." She frowned, realising how cruel her words were going to sound. "Because, little one, our people are seen as monsters. Because, in truth… some of us are monsters…"

"Am… Am I a monster?"

Saarebas pulled his head up gently, wiping tears away with a timid thumb. She didn't need to think what she was doing, and for the first time it didn't feel wrong to her.

"No, my sweet little one." Her lip curled up slightly. "You and your sister are the most precious and pure creations. You are my heart."

She placed his tiny grey hand over the area where her scared heart beat steadily. His eyes widened, stunned with the nature of care his mother was showing.

"You are not monsters." She added firmly. "Never question that. One day, you will be strong, fierce… dangerous… But, what you chose to do defines whether you are a monster or not… not what you appear to be…"

She paused; was there truth to what she was saying? Her words went against all the Qun poisoned into her mind from birth. Did she believe her children were not capable of what she thought was evil? What if Adaar developed magic, or Ash? Would she be able to still see them as they once were; innocent and pure?

She looked down into her sons watery eyes. The answer was obvious. He smiled sweetly, a little lopsided and teeth missing. His nose was runny and eyes looked itchy; his hair tangled and a mess. He was perfect. And she would always see him that way. She didn't deserve him.

"You are not a monster my son." She sighed. "Despite being born from one…"

"You are not a monster, Mamma." Adaar shook his head, almost angrily. "Monsters aren't beautiful. You are definitely not a monster, that's just silly."

Saarebas watched him with curiosity, her son had a fire in him, a strength that not even his father could hold. If he had been born in the Qun, things might have been different. He might have changed things. He still could.

She almost chuckled, almost. Something she had not felt the desire to do in many years; since before she became Saarebas. Adaar, no Taurus, watched her with confusion. No doubt he had never seen his mother in such a way. He was as confused as Saarebas was. She pressed her forehead against his, a tiny hint of a smile touching her lips as she closed her eyes happily.

She could tell Taurus was smiling, grinning rather. No more fear, no more sadness. His mother had chased his fear away.

A Saarebas is not born for this role. Nor should she ever have been given it. But, Saarebas was grateful every day that she was given the chance to try and prove herself. She would try to remember this feeling when the darkness returned, try to feel worthy of the joy her children gave her. She would never be perfect, but by some miraculous miracle… she had created it.

**A/N:**

**Okay, so Saarebas suffers from PTSD and severe depression and even probably a touch of post natal depression, since Ash is probably not even a year old at this point. I hope portraying her character isn't offensive and I did so tastefully. I have PTSD, so I just went off my own feelings and experience with having it. ****  
Anyway, I just wanted to clear up that little detail about Saarebas/Saare. Because she seemed a lot more blunt in Qunari Do Not Love, and I just wanted to demonstrate that sometimes she has up days and sometimes she has down days. She isn't a bad mother, hell no, I think she is a pretty bloody fantastic mother! I just wanted to show you all that even though she is doing the best with what little she has, she still doesn't feel like she is adequate enough. **

**Man... this family gives me way too many emotional feelings D: *hugs screen* I love them so much!  
Not sure how many more of these shorts there will be though. See how inspiration takes me *shrugs*  
**


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